(the misadventures of an expatriate corporate dropout)

Saturday, January 31, 2009

won't see THAT in Oakland.

so today I'm driving through the countryside, on my way home from a remote brocante (thrift store) called Tricycle Enchanté. It was part thrift store, part salvage, part recycled ... which was cool as you don't see that a lot here. everything was neatly sorted ... outdoors there were lots of bicycles and old sinks and bidets and metal pieces, etc etc etc. Indoors were clothes, furniture, kitchen items and all the other crap you find with a few buried treasures. Also a big selection of books.

anyway, there I was rambling on the country lane about 1:30 p.m., fields of brush and cut sunflower stalks and patches of woods on either side. a brown flash charging from the left and I instinctively applied the brakes...as a HUGE and fucking hairy brown wild boar comes hurling across the road ... narrowly missing my bumper. It kind of slowed and zigged a bit in front of me and then tumbled into the brush on the other side. its hot breath created plumes of 'smoke' in the cold air.

I had to pull over and stop for a sec. my heart was pounding out of my chest. but then I had visions of my own French version of "Cujo"... and stepped on it.

jesus.

8 comments:

Randal Graves said...

Won't see the Black Hole loons in France. Each country has its own version of violently vulgar animal species.

Just think, if you were packing heat, you could have had wild boar for dinner tonight!

Non Je Ne Regrette Rien said...

RG-lmao, yeah for some reason flashes of Riana scolding me for not stepping ON it instead of the brakes came to mind. Then I could have hauled that sucker home and skinned him.

yeah. like that would ever happen. Maybe I could have bribed Jean-Yves to skin him, though. hmmm.

Kathleen said...

So my intuitive husband David says that it was just an illusion... your subconscious giving you a glimpse of your masculine side:)...and I say, if that's the case, we're so happy that you left that part of you in the U.S.corporate pig pen and that France has brought out your more feminine parts...
Don't you think it's a bit ironic that this happened so close to groundHOG day??!!

La Framéricaine said...

Congratulations on having avoided a potentially deadly accident with the villan in "Old Yeller."

I'm sure that in France there are people who have died in car wrecks with des sangliers et des cerfs. Very cool story for your grandchildren one of these days. You'll be the Mémé Rose of France.

Coooooollll!

Our Juicy Life said...

Ah...how exiciting a sanglier....we so want to see one, hopefully we will before we leave. Did you scream? Our friends were driving last week to St. Antonin and they saw a heard of them 8 big ones and 3 babies, charging through the fields. Glad he didn't hit your car, but now you can saw you saw one!

Riana Lagarde said...

they are scary to see on the road, they'll take you down if you just piss them off too. i heard that insurance doesnt cover us down here for hittign sangliers with the car, because then we would all do it (so they think!)hahaha. well, i would.

Non Je Ne Regrette Rien said...

Kathleen~monsieur da-veed compares me to un sanglier!! merde!!

laF~yes, I'm told they are especially dangerous in the spring.

NotreV~I'm sure you will spy one or more on a lazy ride in the countryside. Be on guard, they are not friendly!

Riana~ I KNEW it! you'd have butchered it on the spot!

Kathleen said...

my husband is a bad boy sometimes..