daring to think ahead. a little.

so now major hurdles that just weeks ago seemed so formidable and imposing have been cleared. three moves. items packed. items sold. items discarded. remains stored. homes cleaned. homes rented. dogs inspected and chipped and documented. visa obtained. hotels rented. cars rented. car purchased.

the originally daunting and long list has diminished dramatically. sure there are remaining tasks. no milestones. other than boarding the plane. worrying about the dogs on the flight over.

but I've reached a juncture. can I now begin to think about the life that awaits me? my friends, it has been well over a year since I laid eyes on my home in Brantôme. the purchase of my home was long and drawn out. to be told in a future blog. a 9 month process! yeah, I get the significance of the number! I haven't seen my home since I first made the offer to purchase it. it is an ephemeral, intangible remembrance at the moment.

there it has sat. unattended. a bit forlorn. it has been so long, that to recall all of the details of the floorplan, i have to rummage through my paperwork. look at photos. plot maps. call my daughter for reference points. when I bought the house, I had some concrete dreams for it. design-wise.

but now I'm pulling back. the state of the dollar, the state of my finances ... will mean a more modest approach. the major renovations I envisioned (kitchen and new bath) will most likely give way to paint, sanding, elbow grease. one appliance at a time. design in phases. scrupulously trying to retain as much of the age as possible, while improving the functionality where possible.

this much I know. I have a hot water boiler! hoo-Rah! and oil heat in radiators! oh-Kay! I have old wood floors and old stone fireplaces and ratty ceiling material disguising old old beams. I have bugs. and helpful hints about spraying lots of them in the manner the French swear by. I have overgrown gardens and rusty gates and an old stone well. I have beautiful old plants in hibernation, awaiting some love and nurturing.

I've decided to focus on what I have versus what I don't. How to make what I have work well and what I don't have as unnecessary as possible.

I found a lovely article, written brusquely by some irritable, slightly huffy sounding French person, describing the french provincial kitchen. how wholely unneeded are so many items that other nationalities design their kitchens with. very tut tut and tsk tsk (hmm, maybe the author was a closet Brit?!). Kitchens are for preparing FOOD. not displaying. not visiting. non. non. non. but I have also gleaned a lot of good inspiration from this article. clean. functional. basic. useful. compact. all very helpful themes for an old french kitchen.

Well simplicity is good but the kitchen is the stomach of the home. the way to our hearts. the warmth and love should radiate and entice. a place to congregate. not just churn out jaw dropping gourmet cuisine.

I chide myself for trying to attempt designs and ideas in my head when my recollections can be quite off the mark after all this time. be patient. wait till you get there. then you can start your new life in full! but my visions keep returning. (I'm rambling here....yep yep).

Then I remind myself of what a dear fellow I know said to me when I wrote to inform him of my big life changes, that I was moving to France to start my new life. He replied kindly, "your new life has already started!". (thank you Bill, that was an epiphanous moment!) Coming from someone who has actually transformed his life towards his passion, that meant so much.

So despite my internal scolding, I'm starting my dreaming immediately. dammit. not a moment to lose.

day 38. all is good. or as my mirror reminds me. tout est bien.